


The Elegance of a Bad Lie

by thingsishouldntbedoing



Series: The Elegance Of [2]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Headcanon, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-01
Updated: 2015-03-01
Packaged: 2018-03-15 19:10:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3458570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thingsishouldntbedoing/pseuds/thingsishouldntbedoing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had been acting as Arthur’s chauffeur, had been just a little too personal with him at a gala they had attended, and had cocked it all up. (AKA that fic where Harry asks about headcanons.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Elegance of a Bad Lie

**Author's Note:**

> So this came about from this post [on tumblr.](http://kingsmanposts.tumblr.com/post/112390217699/harry-hart-what-is-a-headcanon-eggsy-fuck-harry)
> 
> I couldn't resist writing it.

“Bloody _wankers_.” Eggsy knocked his heel against Harry’s desk. “For fuck’s sake.”  
  
“I enjoy how much more upset about this you are than I am?” Harry smiled over the paper held delicately in his fingers. “It’s a simple mistake.”  
  
“Our _faces_ are in the _paper_ , Harry! And it’s my fault! I should have been more discreet. I was your handler for that mission I should have…” He rose and stalked around the desk, tapping the picture as if Harry hadn’t seen it. Harry with his hand to his glasses, with Eggsy’s arm around the small of his back and the umbrella above them as he helped his charge into the car.  
  
He had been acting as Arthur’s chauffeur, had been just a _little_ too personal with him at a gala they had attended, and had cocked it all up.  
  
“Everyone’s trying to find out who we are,” Harry mused.  
  
“Why are you so goddamn _calm_ about this?” Eggsy bristled. “People are _Googling_ us!”  
  
“Googling is a verb now?” Harry said under his breath.   
  
“ _Harry Hart_ why are you so calm?”  
  
“Why should I be mad? The paparazzi took a picture of us. We are now internet famous.” Harry finally folded the paper and looked up at his lover. “Why should there be a problem?”  
  
“Oh I dunno? What about _Kingsman_?”  
  
“And does this somehow prevent us from doing our jobs?” Arthur’s eyebrow arched up, highlighting the wicked curve of his scars.  
  
“No but… I mean… _highest level of discretion_?”  
  
Harry curled his fingers around Eggsy’s tie and pulled him down, smile softening his features. Eggsy couldn’t resist the soothing touch of Harry’s mouth to his, catching Harry’s armrest to brace himself. If Arthur wasn’t concerned he supposed there was no reason to argue.

Except when Roxy introduced him to a side of the internet he had never explored before. Then he probably _should_ have argued.  
  
He quickly discovered that there were people in the world that were obsessed with the relationships of others. People who created back stories with ease and manipulated pictures with masterful strokes… some of whom had latched onto the photos that had been taken of Harry and himself.  
  
And all of it absorbed him.  
  
He spent hours scouring the websites for whatever interesting stories they could create, laughing at the farfetched and the too-close-to-home. Even when he was at home, or in bed, or supposed to be doing real work - he couldn’t drag himself away from the weirdness.  
  
Not, at least, until Harry asked.  
  
“Eggsy what it that you’re doing?” He heard his partner fold his newspaper, the crumple of paper familiar in the lamplight of the bedroom.  
  
“Reading headcanons,” Eggsy answered easily, voice dying on his lips when he realised what he’d admitted to.  
  
“Headcanons?”  
  
“Fucking hell…”  
  
“What are headcanons?” Harry was already leaning, interest piqued. “You spend hours upon hours looking at them. I _know_ you’re not doing your work on that phone.”  
  
“Uhhh…” Eggsy toyed with the idea of throwing his phone out the window and pretending nothing had happened but was almost certain _that_ was more suspicious than the alternative - which was introducing Harry to the rather demented side of the internet he’d become fascinated with.  
  
“ _Eggsy_?” Harry’s eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“Headcanons…” his voice nearly breached his lips as a whine. “This is the dumbest fuckin’...”   
  
Harry looked at him beneath raised brows, lips pursed with curiosity and impatience, and - ever brilliant at thinking under pressure - Eggsy decided to take another route entirely.  
  
If there was one thing Harry Hart couldn’t resist it was the offer of a good shag and Eggsy would rather be fucked senseless than try to explain what the fuck he was doing. Kissing him, hard and demanding, had lead to the rough slide of muscular bodies and the chorus of groans and ungentlemanly swears that left the air in room humid and thick.  
  
Afterward, laying fucked out and groggy on Harry’s too-soft sheets, he held onto the strings of hope that he was in the clear. At least until - “Do not think I won’t find out what you’re hiding.”  
  
 _Shit._

**Author's Note:**

> Come chat with me on tumblr at [serahgalahad](http://jocunditea.co.vu/) or on twitter.


End file.
